“Stop beating yourself up. You are a work in progress; which means you get there a little at a time, not all at once.” – Unknown
When I left my corporate job to pursue my passion business, I was so psyched and eager to get it moving. I was so hungry to have my new website up and running that I was saying “Yes” to everything. I thought this would help accelerate the process of making money doing what I love.
I got caught up with my desperation to see results, thinking I am going to defy what others say: “it takes time to get your business up and running.”
I signed up for everything, as I was determined to absorb all the information I can and put the knowledge to work. I even signed up and paid a huge lump sum for web and marketing services with someone who I thought would really provide value without doing my due diligence and checking references. After all, he hung around many people who I respected, so I got lazy and thought to myself I should be fine.
What ended up happening was my gut was right, the web and marketing services I received was not up to par with my expectations. My heart ached knowing I paid way too much for the amount of time I spent on the follow ups and my expectations of the service provided. I needed to relieve myself from the sense of disappointment I felt.
The thing is the more I thought about how I needed to be kind to myself and stop beating myself up, the more wound up I got wound up and let it bother me.
I asked my mentor about this and she said, “well what is keeping you stuck?” I said my judgment towards myself, and my business success is being based on one poor decision I made.
Mentor: Does this belief empower or disempower you?
Mentor: What belief can you have instead to help empower you?
Me: I will be successful despite of a bad decision.
As the words came out of me, I was delighted to receive this insight from within.
As the conversation continued, many more nuggets of wisdom surfaced that served as great reminders on how you can shift your mindset and relieve yourself from a decision you regret.
1. Remember your Passion.
This is about restoring your focus on your end goal instead of the problem. When you have your eyes on the end goal, and why is it important for you to achieve what it is you want, your mind will start to seek solutions instead of dwell in the circumstance. Your tenacity kicks in and this is what keeps you unstuck and drives you forward in getting things done when the going gets tough.
2. See Mistakes as Mis(s)-Takes
I love this concept because it encourages us to experiment and explore. From our mistakes or failures, there’s always a lesson to be learned to help us grow. This is the gem when we are able to accept our “Miss” Take and seek the lesson in the Mistake. In doing so, we shift our energy resourcefully towards focusing on the next steps in getting back on track, rather than using our energy in an un-resourceful way.
3. Nothing is permanent in life. This too shall pass.
Change is a constant in life. It is a bit surreal and uncanny when you think about it, because moment to moment things can change, which means each moment is a start of something new. When things are going well in your life, you try and savor the moment as long as can, because you know things can change. On the other hand, when things aren’t going the way you want, you can’t wait for change. In essence, there is no point to get attached to something, but to appreciate change. When you do, it puts you in the driver seat in taking charge of your next move.
4. Get a mentor or call a trusted friend.
As human beings, it is our innate nature to want to connect with one another, share our experiences and feel supported in our lives. The key is to surround yourself with people who are positive influences and provides you with objective insights that inspire and challenges you to be at your best.
5. Forgive yourself.
Accept your own apology. We often focus on the idea of forgiving others, why not forgive ourselves for making a bad decision and restore the love for ourselves? We not only will feel more at peace and less stressed, but it also positively affects our mental and physical well-being.
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Don’t let a bad decision bring you down. Reclaim your power and put it to good use, in ways that make you feel good and free. What do you do to get over a bad decision?
Photo by Carl Nenzén Lovén