“If not us, then who? If not now, then when?” ― John E. Lewis
I have always been a go-getter, someone who wants to be the best. And from an early age, I have known that I wanted to do big things with my life. I wanted to be a “career woman”, one who worked twelve hours a day at a career I loved. I wanted to make thousands of dollars per year, go on luxury vacations, fall in love, and have it all. So I did what you are supposed to do: I got good grades, went to university, and scored high paying job in finance.
I graduated university with the hopes that I would find the job I had always wanted. But after being out of school for a few years and working in the corporate world I just felt bored. Bored and empty. I found myself thinking “Is this it?”. I felt like there must me something more. Something else out there.
That’s when I started doing a ton of research. I wanted to know that it took to make an OK life into an extraordinary life!
I studied all my “self-help” heroes to see what they did to become happy and fulfilled. I read books by Gabby Bernstein, Tony Robbins, Napoleon Hill, Henry Ford, and others. I read hundreds of books on happiness, finding your purpose, creating habits, and money. And, over time, I started to see some patterns.
I started to see the key things that can make your life so amazing you can’t even believe it’s all real. The following strategies come from the above people. They are the patterns I found when looking at their amazing lives.
1. Be Specific
I bet you constantly have a list of things you want to do in life running through your head. I know I do: buy a rental property, live in London, own a kayak, be able to do a chin up, my list goes on. And I’m sure yours does too.
We all have things we want to do but just can’t seem to ever get around to actually doing them. And do you know why that is? Most of the time, it’s because we aren’t asking for specific things.
The first strategy to getting anything you want is: be specific.
Many people, including me, have the tendency to ask for general things. Things like “make more money” or “travel more often” or “lose some weight”.
You need to get way more specific about your goals.
Being specific means knowing what you want. When you want it. Who will be there with you when you get it, and what will life look like once you have obtained it.
Instead of saying “I want to make more money” tell me exactly how much you want to make. How will you feel when you get it? When do you want to be making this amount by? Why this specific amount?
Once you can see your goal in exact detail then you can start to figure out how to get there.
2. Don’t Let Anyone Tell You That You Can’t
The second strategy to get whatever you want is: don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t.
Whenever someone tells you “you can’t do ______”, what they are really saying is “I can’t do ______ and you make me feel uncomfortable”. It might be your friends, your family or your teacher… eventually someone is going to tell you that you can’t.
Going after your dreams takes a lot of guts. You are building a life that few people have the courage to live. You travel and own property. You work for yourself and you spend loads of money on dinners and drinks with your friends. You have a life that scares people.
When people are afraid they tend to try and stop you because they don’t want to be uncomfortable. You can’t let them stop you! I have a quick story for you.
I bought my first home when I was twenty years old. I was still in university and only worked a few hours a week. When I told people that I was planning on buying a home pretty much everyone scoffed at me. No one believed that a university student could save up enough money to buy a home. But I just smiled politely and did it! I bought a house! Anything is possible if you decide to do it.
Sometimes other people are not the problem. In a lot of cases, we have an amazing support system in place and everyone is our cheerleader. And the only person who keeps saying “You can’t do it” is yourself.
We come up with excuses and reasons why we can’t. We tell ourselves things like “it’s already been done”, “you aren’t smart enough”, or “you are too old or too young”. And, over time, we start to believe it.
The point is, don’t let anyone, or yourself, tell you that you can’t do something.
Instead, think of all the reasons it can work! Think of all the reasons you believe in yourself. Know that you are powerful and in control.
3. Take Action
I have this friend, Donna, that HATES her job as a marketing assistant. She hates every day of her life that she is working. She complains daily about her boss, the boring work, and the toxic environment at the office. Whenever I ask her what she would rather be doing she says things like “I think I would like engineering but I don’t know”. And when I ask if she has looked into what it would take to be an engineer she says no and then goes back to complaining.
She has never even Googled what being an engineer looks like. All she would have to do is pull out her phone and look at some websites and it could change her life in amazing ways. Yet she doesn’t do anything.
This brings me to the third strategy to getting whatever you want in life: take action.
Nothing happens without some sort of action. You can plan and plan and plan forever but if you don’t do anything about those plans, it will never be. If you are ever feeling stuck it’s most likely because of a lack of action.
When I was in university I received a signed copy of ‘More Than Cashflow‘ by Julie Broad. On the inside page, the author had written: “the missing piece is always action”. I can’t tell you how much that little note changed my life because it is so true.
Action usually means getting out of the house and actually doing something. But it could also be as simple as Googling a question you have.
Once you start taking some action the universe will bend to make things happen for you. You will meet that person, stumble upon the book you need, and get that call. There is nothing that can stand in your way. The missing piece is always action.
If you are stuck spend some time writing down twenty things you could do right now to get one step closer to your goal. Sometimes, just getting the ideas flowing can give you enough moment to get moving.
4. Let it Go
The final step to getting anything you want in life is: let go.
You need to trust the process, trust yourself, and trust that the universe has your back. You need to decide that you are going to get the life you want and then let it go.
Put all your intentions out into the universe, focus on it, need it, want it. Set out your specific goals, know that you can do it, take that first step and then let it all go.
The letting it go step can be the hardest. If you are anything like me and feel the need to control everything, letting go can be a struggle. But, I promise you, once you go through the steps above and put everything in motion inertia will take over.
You don’t need to constantly be in control of everything. And you definitely don’t always need to know the answers. But you do need to trust that it will all work out the way it is supposed to, because it will!
As you go through the above steps you will start to see what I mean. Doors will open up for you, you will meet the right people, and things will just happen!
Define your goals, decide that you can, take some action, and then let the universe take over. You will be amazed at what you can do.