Mindset

It’s far from unusual for any college student about to graduate to be a bit apprehensive about what their future holds. Questions of whether they’ll be able to find a job, be able to compete with those seeking similar positions, and be able to sustain themselves in the “real world” all start to creep up when the reality of graduation starts sink in. It didn’t particularly help in my case that I was graduating in 2009 with one of the worst outlooks for finding jobs among graduates on top of the fact that I was getting my degree in, of all things, music.

I never thought I’d have these feelings of apprehension though. After all, I grew up knowing exactly what I wanted to do: Be a rockstar. The idea of having an ordinary job and simply “making a living” to “get by” used to make me sick to my stomach, that is at least until I graduated high school and realized that it’s a nice thing to be able to pay my own rent.

So naturally I did what any reasonable person would do, I compromised.

Do you see it as a constant string of responsibilities or as a plethora of opportunity? Do you feel crushed by the weight of it or enthralled by its wonders? Most people walk through life with constant fears,

“I didn’t do anything today!” I always end my day with this frustration. There is too little time and too much I want to achieve and too many people to see.

Before going to bed, I think about all the things I have not done: I did not practice my taichi, I did not practice calligraphy, I did not run, I did not write a blog post, I did not check in with my doctor, I did not reply to emails…

I live with fear that I’m wasting my time being ill, that people are passing me by every day, surpassing me, and they will get to where I want to be before me. I compare to the extreme and I beat myself up for not doing what everyone else is doing i.e. having a respected job, earning the big bucks I used to, and getting on with life.

Do you ever feel as though you’re at wit’s end? Do you keep wishing for some kind of break? Are you hoping that your life may eventually turn around for the better? We have good news: no matter how bleak your life outlook may be, that is ultimately a matter of perspective. And the good thing about perspective: once you change it, reality often follows suit.

No, we don’t mean to say that you may suddenly become enlightened. This is not to encourage you to remain idle waiting for some kind of magical secret to unfold. You are not to rely on the whims of the universe and get caught up in delusions, not unless you fail to miss the point.

When we’re teenagers, we hate the thought that our parents can limit our decisions. I remember my father not allowing me to stay out late with my boyfriend and feeling utterly defeated. How could he do that to me?

Obviously, parents have every right to restrict their children’s decisions during their formative years. Looking back on high school, I’m grateful for all the decisions my father made for me. Without his guidance, I wouldn’t have become the person I am today.

“Well, that was great,” my friend began as we drove away from the newest Batman flick. “But now I have to go back to the real world, instead of the Batman world.”

I asked him what he meant. After all, Bruce Wayne and Gotham City aren’t real, but my friend here seemed to mean something more than that. He went on to explain that there are no heroes like that in the real adult world. In the real world, heroes just aren’t practical. In the real world, we must occupy ourselves with the gray repetition of maintaining our fragile lives. Optimism bows the knee to routine. In the real world, there’s no Batman.

Bull.